Outside of the fence.
Right is defined with surgical precision. There are no margins so there's no lingering in them, and wrong is easily knowable. Life is lived in the basin created by the swirling 'rightness'. When the entire decision-making process can be circumvented by consulting the checklist of what's right, you can be lulled into the serenity of presumptuous certainty.
"You guys go swimming on Sabbath?"
"You don't?"
"Of course not!! It would be a sin."
***pause***
"But we can ride our bikes."
"On SABBATH?!"
And so you bump against the boundaries of "sin" like a carem, and if you're lucky you don't notice the inconsistencies. Because if you notice, they begin eating away at your certainty, your safety. What if right isn't, always?
"I can't believe you pierced your ears," says my Armani-wearing father through outrage-tightened lips.
"Yeah, well, at least I waited until I'm 21 so you're not legally responsible."
"There is no law against it, but it demonstrates vanity. That's the whole reason the Church forbids jewelry."
"Oh," I say, "then it's not vanity to buy stylish clothes, just jewelry?"
"It can be, but clothing has a necessary function." The white lines around his mouth are still visible.
"Well, if function is the litmus test against vanity, then why isn't your Volvo actually a Geo, or does the turbo 'function' protect it from heresy?" My voice elevates in pitch and volume, and I hear the sarcasm taking on a life of its own.
At some point, you find a clear hole in the fence and the choice presents itself: to stay of free will, or else to flee.
Sometime later, my father enters the room with a slight knock. "You remember what you said?"
"Yeah, Dad. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get hostile. I guess it's a hot button."
"I'm sure it is. But it doesn't mean you aren't right. I've been thinking about our conversation, and you made some points with merit. I don't know what I'll ultimately conclude about it, but you've got me thinking. So I guess I should thank you for keeping me on my toes, if nothing else."
But a fence -- any fence, even one with holes -- is still more secure than the wide open spaces.
posted by eclectic @ 8:37 PM
20 comments
20 Comments:
What a nice, thought-provoking post. You know, I think I miss fences almost as much as I resent them.
Hey, he admitted you made him think.
That's more than many will get with a valid argument.
Shari, truly this is beautiful . . . it choked me up. What a blessing you and your father were to each other. It brought out many emotions in me reading this . . . a bit hard to explain. I will buy the book of your stories when you have it published.
A perfect example of why I avoid topics on religion. Well done!
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Sorry about my previous comment *ahem* how embarrassing!
Here's what I wanted to say from ME, not the Frog:
I have always and will always despise hypocrisy. Thank you for reminding me why I don't don't buy into "religion".
I'll buy your book too when it's published (I'll be in line right behind Nanina). I want mine autographed though :-)
Wow. That was excellent. I love "if you're going to use logic on me, I'm going to use that same logic on you" stories..and it's even COOLER when your point is taken.
I love this post!!
Great work!
Logical counter-attacks...gotta love 'em!
Yeah...wanna buy the book.
I like the way you write.
:o)
I think some people stick with very dogmatic religions for exactly what you said. It's much easier when everything is black and white, no thinking, just assuming that you're right.
You presented a great, logical argument. Good for your dad for realizing it.
Awesome post. Too many parts require comment but it has left me "speechless".
Very cool
This is a great post - and your last line is so beautiful and so true. :)
your dad certainly derves a lot of credit for seeing the hole-y fence; it hasn't been my experience that very many people are willing to make such concessions. as for the 'rightness'of a standard, i hate how life, so full of greys, is sometimes forced into boxes of black and white. but... that may be my problem with religion in general.
i admire this post, shari. you're good.
If us humans can't even agree on what is sin I wonder how God decides?
Great post. I wonder if I could ever get my dad thinking when he's wrong.
Another great post!
I'll be in line to buy a copy of your book too...
You have a way of making me think, rethink, and think some more. I wish I had more fence than holes.
I have read this post a number of times and have found it difficult to formulate a comment; it has meaning for me on so many levels. I have to print it out and have it handy, to share. This is the first time I have read the comments, and dammit, I was going to be first in line for the book, but now I'm way back in that line. That's OK, I'll wait for my autographed copy.
"the serenity of presumptuous certainty": that is an excellent line, and I know, I SO know, what you mean. I have my very solid beliefs. And I still sometimes am, just for a moment, envious of those who live in that serenity, that place where right and wrong requires so little thought, because it is pre-determined. But it is only for a moment that I envy, because I do prefer living in the space that still requires me to think.
You are just the cat's pajamas, Ms. Shari.
OK, you guys... I'm so far behind responding to comments that I don't even know what to say. You have all been incredibly generous with your comments and praise, and to be honest I'm a little overwhelmed that the meanderings of my mind and spirit can strike a chord in anyone. And if I ever did write a book, none of you would want a copy because I would keep you busy editing all the rewrites and you'd be sick of it by the time it got to publication...!
Oooh, oooh guess what? My word verification has "damn" in it:
yxdamnl
*heh heh*
i wonder if that need to continually re-edit isn't why more good writers never try their hand at a book. i say, go for it anyways, and the worst that happens is disappointment.
nothing ventured nothing gained, eh?
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